I think I magically OD'd on these posts, so I had to take a step back for a while. Now my assumption is that Kelly and Megan just wanted to set up the blog so I would continue to snark and they could laugh. pshaw.

Anyway, allons-y, as my friend the Doctor would say! Wuthering Heights. I know, I'm picking a fight with a lot of people. There are two reasons why I read this book; reason one, because I never had to in school and it's a classic, and reason two, because it's Bella's favorite book in Twilight and if I can continue to rip apart those stupid books, I will. So I read it, the book which Bella proclaims and whines and sighs is sooooooooooooooooo romantic.

Of course, this coming from the girl who isn't afraid that her VAMPIRE BOYFRIEND might bite her. Obviously she has psychological issues, not to mention an unhealthy case of denial and a death wish. Girl's messed up. However, I humored her (Bella or her insipid creator, they're interchangeable) and read Miss Bronte's tragedy, conveniently checked out from the library. I don't think you could have persuaded me to buy that book anyway, the film version with Juliette Binoche and Ralph Fiennes was bad enough.

But I digress. I hated this book. It took me nearly three weeks to plod through it, and that's saying a lot considering i read all four Twilighters in 5 days. Then again, not a very hard read, that... Still digressing!

This is why I hated it. The plot. I'm pretty sure I have it figured out, seeing as how it's a very thin plot and goes in one direction towards it, though you don't even know it until the last chapter. Miss Emily was probably a very romantic soul, desirous of a love marriage and not a marriage of convenience of suitability or convenience, both of which are portrayed in the couplings of both Catherine Earnshaw and Edgar Linton, and Heathcliff Heathcliff to Isabella Linton, respectively. Or, worst of all, an arranged marriage for the purpose of acquiring wealth and status, as with Linton Heathcliff and little Cathy Linton. No, the only "romance" to last is that of little Cathy Linton Heathcliff and her freaking first cousin ( one degree of consanguinity, anyone? yuck!!), Hareton Earnshaw. Social commentary? Check. Even though first cousins is just gross.

Ok. so we have, count 'em, one, two ... three! three doomed marriages, ah ah ah! That Sesame Street moment was brought to you by the letter Q.

Three doomed marriages. Why are they doomed? Because in the Romantic era of English literature, there was a big surge of shrugging off the conventional reasons for marrying, and instead, people finally had the gall to take the time and fall in love. They were marrying for what could have been perceived as the right reason, just ask Jane Austen and Elizabeth Gaskell, so older- fashioned marriages in this new and wondrous world of love, tragically fail because of the characteristics found in the outmoded model for marriage. Catherine and Edgar? Convenient, but she was in love elsewhere and sought to make her lover jealous. Heathcliff and Isabella? Completely unsuitable in both worlds. She was in love with him in her mind, and jealous that he was in love with Catherine. He's just insane; Heathcliff is supposedly in love with Catherine, whose station in life is above his, as is Isabella's station (old school unsuitable). As for the new school unsuitable, I don't think you could convince me he was in love with anything or anyone but his revenge. There's no love for Catherine and certainly none for isabella or their child. Speaking of kiddos, Little Cathy and Linton, arranged marriage for the sake of Heathcliff acquiring her wealth upon the impending son. Such an awesome dad.

Doom doom doom. That leaves Little Cathy and Hareton the feral child. Why were they the couple to last? Because, of all four of these pairings, they were the only ones who learned. *Lightbulb!* And what, pray tell, did they learn? Where all the other adults never learned to grow up, they did. They found common ground, learned boundaries about appropriate and inappropriate things to say or do to others, and they taught each other what they knew. Ladies and Gents, welcome to the only tender, true love in this entire book.


Post a Comment